[Story-time]~Connecting the Bridge! ;)

“Hello good evening, this is Abhishek and how may I help you?”
“Hi Abhishek, can you please connect me to the US bridge no.? The number is…”
“Well…I will certainly connect you to the bridge, but before that can I know your project? By the way, you can call me Abhi!”
“O…K! The project is American Pharma and I’m already late for the call, Abhi…shek. Please connect at the earliest.”
“Right away, Ms…?! And what did you say your name is?” ”
Hmm…Can I speak to the supervisor?”
“Well, these are mandatory formalities before connecting to a call. My reportee is on last minute leave & I’m the supervisor speaking. Any issues madam?”
“Anita, that is my name. Please connect me to the call.”

*****************************************************************

Later that night on WhatsApp group – “LR”:
Anita:       You know what happened this evening? This guy no, tries to flirt with me.
Shireesh: Haha..no way!
Anita:       Err, you don’t believe me?
Shireesh: Did that guy even look at you before flirting? :tongueout:
Anita:       No ya, this was on the phone.
Sound:     Lol…
Shireesh: Thought so! :tongueout:
Anita:       I had to connect to this important onsite call and this operator fellow asks me personal questions.
Sound:    First time connecting via operator?
Anita:      Ya, why?! :lookie: His voice sounded good though.
Shireesh: Aha! Hope he asked for your mobile number & home address?
Anita:      Why would he need that?
Shireesh: Just in case the call gets disconnected and he has to reconnect you??
Anita:      O…K! But why does he need my home address?!
Shireesh: Just in case, if things move forward.
Radha:    ROLF…wyh yuo pullign her leg mna?!
Shireesh: First time she spoke about some guy hitting on her, that too around Valentine’s. Must be a sign no?
Anita:       :monkeyclosingeyes: S***id I**ot, wait till I find something on you! :angrybird:
Shireesh: Haha…What if I find the operator before that?! 😉 😉
Radha:    And yuo are speakign as iff yuo knwow this guy! C*****
Sound:    Lol…
Shireesh: What if I really do? 😀

Meanwhile in another WhatsApp group – “Gunday!”:
Abhishek: You know what happened this evening? This gal thinks I am flirting with her.
Shireesh:  Haha…no way!
Abhishek: Err, you don’t believe me?
Shireesh:  Did that gal even look at you when you were supposedly flirting? 😉 😉
Abhishek: No man, this was on a damn call.
Mamman: Lol…
Shireesh: Thought so! :tongueout:
Abhishek: She had to officially connect to this stupid American bridge and wasn’t even giving me the basic details that I need to enter as part of the damn protocol.
Mamman: Definitely must be a virgin caller, dude!
Abhishek: Haha..STFU man! :tearswithlaughter: Her voice was lovely though, man! :smiley:
Shireesh: Aha! Hope you did ask for her mobile number & home address?
Abhishek: Why would I need that?
Shireesh: Just in case her call gets disconnected and you have to reconnect her??
Abhishek: You think I’d be snooping on her call eh, you idiot? And why do I need her home address?
Shireesh: Just in case, if things move forward.
Rahul:      Lol…why you pulling his leg man?!
Shireesh: First time he spoke about some gal and that too around Valentine’s. Must be a sign no?
Abhishek: :middlefinger: S**le, wait till I find something on you! :angrydude:
Shireesh: Haha…What if I find the bridge girl before that?! 😉 😉
Rahul:      And you are speaking as if you know this gal! Karamchand ki aulaad!
Mamman: Lol…
Shireesh: What if I really do? 😀

 

[Cricket]~Never loved another man more…

Sunday – 17th Nov’13

I wonder what would have been on HIS mind when HE woke up today morning. When HE had to give up the one thing HE had done all HIS life just because HIS body couldn’t take it any longer, how would HE have convinced HIS mind & heart?

On the other hand, I wonder if HE did get any sleep at all.

*******************************************************

Friday – 15th Nov’13

A billion hearts were broken at the very particular moment when a part-time West Indian bowler got the 20th wicket of his Test career, a priceless one indeed, which in fact ensured that he got his name imprinted in Cricketing history.

I got back to my work desk from the cafeteria, heavy hearted and all that jazz, back to the daily heap of mundane tasks that would have to be completed, to meet those unrealistic deadlines as well as to collate enough fodder when I sit down to inscribe the over-the-top self-appraisal documents!

I wonder when I will get out, for that one last time. Dear Manager, do we have any West Indian customers, I could work for?

*******************************************************

Saturday – 16th Nov’13

It was an extended work week for me, like most weeks this year. HE would never have cribbed or complained to the BCCI when the matches extended or were scheduled over the weekend.

The devout in me was hoping for a miracle from say a certain Mr. Gayle, a 120-ball double century perhaps, or any such marvel that would make India bat again in the Test.
When Cricinfo updated the fall of the last West Indian wicket, I did the most religious thing an IT professional would do – CTRL+ALT+DEL. Within the next 2 minutes, I was at the cafeteria waiting for HIS final match presentation to begin.

And during the course of the presentation, as HE was speaking, I did something I never would like to confess of having done many times before – I cried.
In all the hurry, I had forgotten to carry something that I thought I would never need – Tissues. Thankfully, the handkerchief I carry came in handy.

I don’t know for sure, if the tears that continuously surged as the little MAN spoke, were the tears of sadness or those of pure joy. I believe I wouldn’t understand those tears for like EVER. One thing for sure was that, this was the end of HIS unforgettable journey, a journey of which I was an integral part of, like most of you mortals out there.

Being a weekend, thankfully the cafeteria crowd was skeletal. I washed my face before I returned to my work desk.

*******************************************************

Thursday – 14th Nov’13

It was Children’s Day, my missus’s Birthday, her Wedding Anniversary & yes, my Wedding Anniversary too. It was supposed to be a happy day with so many things up for celebration. The mind & body agreed but not the heart, for it knew that today was the beginning of HIS end.

I was happy when MSD, being the gracious host he is, asked the guests to bat first. I was happy that I would not have to worry about getting to see HIM walk back to the pavilion on such a joyful day. But what can one do when the guests themselves were so eager to see HIM take strike.

As HE walked in towards the 22 yards of HIS life, the loud uncontrollable heartbeats began. Goosebumps, were like suddenly the second layer of every devout’s skin.

Being an epitome of what HE is truly revered for, HE let the day remain happy.

*******************************************************

Sunday – 17th Nov’13

‘There are some things in life, you never want to learn from.’

From the context of this post, reading this above liner again, I would say that ‘Those are the very things you’d want to keep doing, over & over again’. I say so, for I succumbed to the urge of watching HIS farewell speech again this morning and I sobbed more than I did yesterday, for today I was well within the confines of my solitude. There was no holding back.

*******************************************************

Looking back we were happy, for you were our future…
We looked up to you, as ourselves we did nurture…
We turned out just fine, but is hard to now imagine you in our past…
Looking into the future, we believed this would forever last…

Many have written about the numbers HE has achieved over the last 24 years, but it has never been about those numbers as much as it has been about the man HIMSELF.

Setting aside my dad, I’d say I’ve never loved another man more…

R.E.S.P.E.C.T

Picture source: Twitter

 

[Candid]~ChittyChattyColleague! :)

As I walked into the corporate office 8 long months after being deputed at the customer location, I saw a gentleman approaching with a big smile on his face.

With the company dress-code being made very flexible in the recent past, he was pretty much neatly dressed for it – a tucked-in collared t-shirt, blue jeans that seemed last washed in August and a branded pair of sport shoes. While he walked
along besides me towards my bay, I could sense the green tag around his neck ending up safely within the insides of his t-shirt pocket.

As I took my designated seat in the bay, he seemed all prepared for an uncalled chitchat session as he made himself comfortable at my desk right next to the monitor.

He: “Hey dude, long time. Where had you been? Oh right, you were working out of that client location. Is that assignment done?”
Me: “Hiii, yes I was at the customer location and I’m back here from today.”
He: “Good good, your client was S***** right…heard you had a great time over there?!”
Me: “Don’t know who gave you that information of me having a great time, but yes you got the customer name right!!!”
He (laughs): “No one did, I was just making small talk…Haha…ha!”

I smiled, as I saw him get himself all well settled with his back now being rested against my desk dashboard.

He: “So have you got into a project or what?”
Me: “No, not yet…”
He: “Aish hey yaar…enjoy your time while on bench, for once you’re tagged to a project it’s gonna be tough. Just look at me, for instance!”.
Me: “Yeah right! You seem to be very busy these days!”

I say that, as I take a look (stare??!) at his t-shirt pocket. I see a ball-point pen with “Nayantara’s photograph” on its handle.

He: “Stop staring at my chest yaar.”
Me: “Err…I was just…”
He: “Haha…Ha…just kidding yaar. You can stare as much as you want to!”.
Me (Ewww, in mind): “Err…well, no…I was just wondering who you…I mean how some of you…anyway, where did you get that pen?”
He: “Ah! So you were staring at this pen-ah?! It’s a long story, will tell you during lunch time.”

Lunch time?! Oh no…he was getting more than comfortable now with his legs swinging in the air, for every word he said, for every move he made while his eyes gaze around checking out the fairer junta.

Me: “Oh that’s fine. I’ve a team lunch today. I’ll listen to your pen-story some other time.”
He: “Team lunch?! Whom you trying to make a fool out of, man…you’re on bench no, you just said yourself!”
Me: “That’s correct. What I meant is that my ex-teammates have all come over here and they’ve called me to join them for lunch!!”
He: “Hmmm…So you got married some 2 years back right? Any issues?”

As I wonder what he meant by “issues”, his phone rings “Aa ante Amala…” in decibels exceeding the normal acceptable limits.

He: “Apologies…I gotta take this, an important call!”

Thank god, for it saved me from getting into an awkward topic.

He: “Sorry boss, wrong no.
I’m in a meeting right now, please don’t call me during office hours.
Yes 9-6, but I reach home only after 7:30 ok-wa?!”

He: “So where were we?!”
Me (in taunt mode): “Was that your wife on the call?!”
He: “Hey! So you think I got married without telling you-ah?! What man you…”
Me (now in guess mode): “Oh, but I thought…”
He: “Yes yes, I had a girlfriend. She had a boyfriend, but it was not me. Girls are tough to understand man. Big mistake I did, in trying to assume things. Long story, will tell you sometime.”
Me: “Sorry, my bad man. It’s ok.”
He: “No, it’s not ok. You write blogs no, this could give you a good storyline.”
Me (in scary mode): “You read my blog?”
He: “No, I’ve not but I heard that you do. You must teach me how to, man. Maybe I could find someone I like, you know?!”
Me: “What?!”

Then after some more senseless exchange of sweet-bitter nothings, he got down my desk to eventually take leave, with a promise to get in touch(??) again.

As he left, I asked the colleague sitting next to me if he knew who that guy was. My neighbour who was all the while a silent partner in the conversation laughed, stating “You so wished his ID card wasn’t inside his pocket, isn’t it?! Me too!!” 😀

 

[Humor]~10 reasons why Women can’t shop like a Man! ;)

We all know that Women Love To Shop and we also know Men Do Not Hate To Shop, so then what is it that makes women not shop like a man?! 😛

Here we go:

1. Blame it on the genes, for she’s got the ones that makes her go “Shopppppeeeeeeeeeeng”!

2. She is not satisfied by her shopping spree unless she gets to wait in the queue to the trial/changing room – the only queue where she’s the most patient, ever – and until she tries on half a dozen items, to say the least.

3. She would not know if the garment/dress does fit her. Even if she did, she would not know if she’d look fit or fat on wearing it.

4. Her shopping spree has to be both a combo of window-shopping & the actual shopping.

5. She has to make sure that the garment she’s picking up is unique – not already owned (or worn) by known & unknown people.

6. She does not need to plan on what to buy. She buys it whenever she gets to see something that she likes.

7. She has to look out for all the possible & best bargains before she decides to buy, even if she’s helping someone else do the purchase.

8. Unlike a man, she can’t wait to shop for clothes/shoes/purses until they are worn out.

9. She can quit a sumptuous meal (or go on a diet) if she makes up her mind to fit into something she wants to get into.

10. She does not want to shop like a man, for it is not shopping if one doesn’t take a look at over a 100 items before walking out of the shop without buying anything at all.

PS: Ladies, this is just for fun. However, do let me know of the points that you disagree, if any! 😉

 

“No God to Pray”: My entry for the Get Published contest.

She was wise, cheerful and nice. She was wild, Destiny’s very own nature loving child. She was poetic, quite innately artistic. Poised and mute, she was pretty cute. A dream of every guy, she was Oindrita M Gogoi and went by the nickname, Princess.
Life was all about implementing the Logic, as she wrote code to earn her living as a software professional. Love took a backseat, as all her free time was spent in artistic pursuits.

He was a romantic, who loved his music. Gelled his hair in spikes, he simply loved motorbikes. Medium height and fair, he was a debonair. A dream of every girl all night and day, he was Sushil P Deshpande and went by the nickname, Ryder.
Life was all about maintaining the Logic, as he debugged and re-wrote code to earn his living as a software professional. Love took a backseat, as all the free time was spent his on-road pursuits.

And then there was Gatsu or as his parents had named him, Gatsukh P Chawla. Ironically, he lacked the very guts. He was mysterious, face-less and socially-awkward. A self obsessed Anil Kapoor fan, he loved to brag about the abundant hair growth on his torso. A wannabe poet, his writings spoke about evergreen eternal love for a mystery woman, but his demeanor stated just otherwise.
He followed Princess, in person and on her blog and even considered her as his best friend.

What makes the story ‘Real’:
It’s a story that tells you about life not always presenting a pretty picture.
There are times when the mind acts weird with all creative juices getting blocked. In times such as these, it’s depression galore for Princess.
There are also times when after that lost drop of fuel, life seems to head nowhere. In times such as these, it’s depression galore for Ryder.
It also tells that no situation is permanent, as the protagonists get around to discover the one thing that finally seems to be common among them – Love.

Extract:
And in the summer of 2008, Destiny decides to play its part.
Of all places, at a Corporate Personality Development class they get to meet. The trainer asked the participants to talk on three positive things about themselves. Amidst all the similar and boring answers, stood out one confident reply – “Good Looks, Good Looks and Good Looks” – and of every head that had turned towards the beaming Ryder, one head continued to look at him a tad longer with her little blue eyes, all so mesmerized!

‘Is this Love?’ she asked, no one in particular. In her moment of confusion, “Oh Dear God!” she voiced aloud in her mind, only to feel guilty immediately for she knew no God, to pray or plead! In happiness or pain, she was never taught to seek out to HIM.

Meanwhile in another part of the world, Gatsu was in his own dilemma on whether ‘to poke, or not poke Princess’ on her FaceBook profile.

This is my entry for the HarperCollins–IndiBlogger Get Published contest, which is run with inputs from Yashodhara Lal and HarperCollins India.

 

Art of Saying NO!

A lot many of us have this inability in us to deal with the word of negativity – NO.
We find it very difficult to SAY NO…and at least an equal number of us find it hard to take a NO!
There are even cases where when one says a No, it’s been ridiculed,  understood otherwise or considered to be completely offensive.

From our younger days, it has been instilled in us that saying something in the negative is rude. And this has been passed on, generation after generation.

Instance1: Before Birth
You had no choice to choose your family. So no option to “Accept”/”Decline” your prospective family.

Instance2: After Birth
You hate curd rice , for the curd being bitter or just for the simple reason that you don’t like it. But no, your mom/grandma make sure that you are force fed. You yell NOooooo in your cries, but they don’t happen to understand your lingo! However, they tell you how nutritious & good it is for your day-2-day growth – as if or assuming you understand!

Instance3: You are now attending a Boys-Only School
It’s lunch time. Mom has packed one of your favorites – Cheesy Pasta. Your best friend – who by the way, has brought curd rice in his lunch box – asks you for his share as Pasta happens to be his favorite too.
You want to say No, yet you can’t say or rather you don’t know how to say No. He waits no longer, grabs your lunch box and grabs half the content. You are heartbroken.
He offers you half his curd rice. You either accept & eat it reluctantly because you are hungry or choose to stay hungry & throw it out later on your way back home – but you don’t say no (What if he says “You are no  longer my best friend”?, What if he says “God/Mother promise, I will never talk to you or let you play with my cricket bat!”?, etc).

Instance4: You move into a Co-ed College
Except for your grandma, mom, aunts, sister & teachers in school, you have never spoken to the opposite gender in your life so far. And then your best friend dares you to go ask a girl, her name. You don’t decline as you have no choice but to go ahead with the dare, for otherwise you fear that you could get “branded”. What happens next, makes you hate the fairer sex, for being so insensitive/rude. You had after all just asked her name. Your pink left cheek, trends as it gets itself added to the eternal folklore of the college corridor gossips!

Instance5: You find yourself in an Engineering College
Medicine was your career choice, but grandma wanted an engineer in the family. “If you fall sick, I can suggest you the medication…but I cannot repair the radio!” was her way of convincing the generations that followed hers.
Because you cannot disappoint your grandma nor go against her wishes, you take admission into any college that has vacant seat in its last benches.
You flirt with all those gals that come your way during the four years, as you think you’d have grandma’s blessings for the same. You propose to a few, who say NO to you. But then since you do not believe in  “Rejection”, you still end up going behind them expecting a positive nod from their end. You even seek blessings from your grandma, to go about your (unknowingly sinister) desire!

Instance6: And then you get into being a Professional
You get those meeting requests. How many of you think twice when you have to click on “Decline”? How many of you end up clicking on “Accept”? How many of you go 50-50, as you opt for “Tentative”? (In the initial days, I’ve myself been guilty of clicking “tentative” and not attending the meeting instead of plainly declining it in the first place! Over time, I’ve learnt that it’s not rude to click on “Decline”, for if it was then it wouldn’t have be one among the options! 😉 )
You get a mail from your supervisor, about having to attend a “mandatory” training on his/her behalf. You wonder who is it mandatory for? You wonder if there is a way to say NO!?
You get copied (Cc-ed) in a mail by your business-analyst informing all the executive-designates that you would be representing on his behalf in the client call! You are not even aware of who the customer is. You have not even been intimated. You start to perspire, for now you have to say NO (but don’t know how to either) which would go into the inboxes of a lot many senior individuals.

Instance7: You happily get married & dance at your wedding too.
Once the regular life starts, you wonder – why you commit a lot of mistakes, why you end up on the wrong feet, why you are always held responsible for something that goes wrong – till that very moment where you Stop Saying a NO!

Instance8: And when you get kids
You fear that a “No” from your end, could make your kid compare you with the parents of his/her friends. What if you are not On-par? What if you…

Teach your kids, to say “No” to something they do not believe in…
Teach your kids, to respect someone who says a “No” to them…
Teach your kids, that their life (and of others) will be much better if they KNOW the proper usage of NO!

Know the NO! 😀

Post dedicated to Jyoti Singh Pandey!

 

[Review]~Sethji, by Shobhaa De’…

He was poor. He was a self-made man. He was shrewd and ruthless. He considered himself the modern-day Chanakya. He was Sethji.

She was ‘a woman’. She was married into a political family. She had no choice. Her body was her deadliest weapon. Her name was Amrita.

Shobhaa De, the author of “Sethji” weaves a tale around a political setup. As a reader, you can almost guess who she is pointing/referring at, if you are aware of our biggest reality show called ‘The Indian Politics’.
The author is well aware of the fact that in India (and outside too), Sex and Erotica sells, and she has made sure to add this masala in almost every chapter of the book. 55-56 chapters, so you can imagine how much!!

At some places, the masala seemed so invalid like how Bollywood adds songs in between two serious scenes of a movie. Something like:
Scene1: Heroine’s father/mother is serious and is struggling for life in an ICU.
Dream Song: The heroine is running wildly around the trees, not praying for her father’s/mother’s health but mockingly escaping from being groped by the hero.
Scene2: The hero is on his way to the hospital and meets with an accident as he was busy dreaming the song sequence while driving!

Point is: At some of the places in the plot, the masala write-up just wasn’t needed. Amrita has not just been exploited, but over-expoited, time and again!

The novel as such is a political drama, the storyline of which I will not divulge for the sake of those who would like to read ’Sethji’. All I can say is that, there is – pain, confusion, betrayal, assassination, infidelity, incest and too much of life ka drama.
The book is a good read, if you like – Indian Politics, Metaphorical Characterization (you will keep guessing as to which political/bollywood bigwig the author is talking about, throughout the length & breadth of the book!), the Masala (to an extent, who doesn’t?!) and Shobhaa De’s free flow (straight-talk) writing style.

IMHO – Shobhaa De’s much better & crisp when it comes to her shorter write ups (newspaper columns, blog posts, etc) than in her novels. A little more efforts in editing would have improved the end product (Found a few spelling typos myself!).

Note: If I’ve known Shobhaa De well, by reading her writings till now – I’d definitely NOT believe that the story of this novel to be entirely fictional, as she and Penguin (the publisher) puts it to be. 😉

Rating: 3.5/5

Image courtesy: Penguin Books India.

 

Parody[14]~Code-um Logic-um… ;)

This is a stupid song “Dream-um Wakeup-um” from Rani-Mukherji–Prithviraj‘s latest movie “Aiyaaa” and it has now been made even more drastically stupid by engineering it with our IT industry funda…won’t call this the Best Practice though!

Here we go: Lemme know if it fits to the tune!
 
Code-um logic-um not-at-all compiling-um
Bug-um error-um bill full client wakeup-um
 
Case to case-um testing fail-um
Base to top-um fulltu escalation-um
Server-um citrix-um down-um surrender-um
Small-um matter-um (now) big-um blunder-um
Sundaram… Arunachalam…
Kalyan-um…Narayana-um…
Onne rende moone, no…surely all naalavdu bucket-num
 
Start meeting-um finger-a pointing-um
Respect lost trouble vast, gotta escape-num
Excel sheet-um Data corrupt-um
Google search I’m feeling no lucky-um
Shame to shame-um, waste s/w engineer-um
Full-um screw-um Appraisal rating-um…
 
Server-um citrix-um down-um surrender-um
Small-um matter-um (now) big-um blunder-um
Sundaram… Arunachalam…
Kalyan-um…Narayana-um…
Onne rende moone, no…surely naalavdu bucket-num!

“Like“?

You can read my old parodies – HERE.

Glossary: Onne – One, Rende – Two, Moone – Three, Naalavdu = Fourth..

 

[Social Mess-up]~When Emotions become Reactions…

Emotions are known to be something that we humans have aplenty in abundance. We emote at anything and in any situation. Emotions could be varied – good, bad, happy, sad and so on. But there is a vast difference when one shows off his/her emotions in person and when online.
Emotions displayed online, are mostly reactions is what I feel. Let me take two similar cases of such reactions on FaceBook (FB).

#1 Picture this one sad tale:
As usual, I was logged into FB on that Thursday night. A friend who had got married over a year ago, but had not shared his wedding photos on FB, had finally relented to the umpteen requests by his friends by posting about 2-3 photos of the memorable occasion.

Legend has it that, if something is not already on FB, it has never happened.

Anyway…one particular photo of the newly married couple sitting on stage, was trending, with friends ‘like’ing and posting wishes in the comment section. Now knowing him in person, I was aware that it was an old photograph. Yet, I followed others in wishing him….a mere reaction! He replied to all our comments, till about 9:30 pm that night.

Friday:
I do not get to log into FB during the day time on weekdays, but I do get notifications on email/cellphone. One notification mail on that particular wedding photo read “How could this happen to you, you being such a sweet person?!”
I was kind of surprised as to why would someone say something like that on a wedding picture.

On reaching home, I first logged in to FB via that notification link to check why such a comment was made in such a happy picture. And that is when I got to know!
Unfortunately, it so happened that that very night this friend of mine had succumbed to a blockage in his heart artery (he was diagnosed & being treated for acidity, I’m told)! 😦

But then the downfalls of a social network is such that, the picture you post in an album in your profile appears on the wall of your friends! And in this case, his wedding photograph continued to get wishes…some of which were very heart wrenching like “you both look lovely…may you have many more years of happiness” and others alike.

Again a case of mere reactions!! Hmm..

#2 Two weeks ago:
On a Monday morning, my cousin’s Labrador ‘Buddy’ died.
Four years ago, when I had just joined FB I had posted a picture of Buddy & me….which had received about 2 likes and 4 comments till then.
That Monday evening, I expressed my condolences on that picture tagging my cousin. He himself had not seen that 4 yr old picture till that moment! 😛

Now for the reaction part:
Since I had dug and commented on an old picture, it was now on the walls of my FB friends.
Since they had never seen two animals in one frame they were excited which were reflected by the 25+ “likes” I got within an hour. 😉 Reaction #1.
A few of them who knew about the death put in their condolences in form of words or sad-smileys (oxymoron?) while the unaware rest discussed about how good the two look together! Reaction #2.
And then when they got to know about the actual, then they conveyed their condolences. Reaction #3.

By nature, we love to ‘follow’…don’t we?! 😀

 

[UnReview]~Heroinzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ;)

I did not want to do this, but then such a juicy opportunity at being appreciative of something *what’s the word* comes in very rarely!

I don’t know what my crazy stars were up to or in which direction did the sun rise on that wonderful day that I booked tickets for ‘Heroine’. I can see that you are already tempted to close this page, for you are sure I’ll give out the storyline. No, don’t worry about it cos even after watching this epic, I wondered about what the storyline actually was.

Anyway, this is not a review of that movie for I do not qualify to criticize something that is, well…not something!
Instead let me note down a few pointers, which the makers had to keep in mind to give it a chance to get itself nominated for the Oscars.

1. It doesn’t matter if you have dialogues or not, but have a storyline. See Barfi.
2. Getting inspired from newspapers to create a movie? Really? If at all you have to get inspired, then go for Notebook/notepad/ipad/etc. See Barfi.
3. It doesn’t matter how much of ‘Fashion’ you have in the movie. It matters if you have Priyanka Chopra. See Barfi.
4. It’s actually ok if you wear much more than a handkerchief. You’d have something to wipe off that perspiration on your brow. See Barfi.
5. You can love someone or be loved even if you are just a nobody. See Barfi.
6. Creating hype increases expectations. Instead, make a movie silently or make a silent movie. See Barfi.

It was all ok till the mid of first half. Then it seemed like the director had forgotten his script back at home/hotel or had lost it to fire. The result of that was it took me 2 full days to recover from what I got to see for the last 75% of the movie’s duration.
Anyway, who am I to talk about someone’s creative thought process? To each his own, isn’t it? Well…so, do not miss to watch Heroine, for it won’t long last. If you end up disappointed at missing it, then See Barfi. 😉